Come Home
by Rogue Callista
Summary: Songfic. A new apprentice helps Luke deal with Callista's abandonment.


Title: Come Home

Author: Rogue Callista

Keywords: Luke, drama, songfic, Cella, Jedi Academy

Rating: G

Disclaimers: This story is based on situations, settings, and characters created and copyrighted by Lucasfilm, Ltd. No infringement is intended. Thanks to Mike Stackpole for the Lusankya incident. No infringement is intended there either. The lyrics to the song, "If You're Gone" were written and owned by Matchbox twenty. (I changed some of them around to fit the story better.) The author wrote this story merely for amusement and does not intend to sell it for profit.

Summary: Songfic. A young apprentice helps Luke heal after Callista leaves.

Author's Note: This story is respectfully dedicated to fans everywhere and especially to those who love sappy stuff like this. 

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If you're gone—maybe it's time to go home

There's an awful lot of breathing room

But I can hardly move

If you're gone—baby you need to come home

'Cause there's a little bit of something me

In everything in you

--Matchbox Twenty, "If You're Gone"

Luke Skywalker stared out at the rising sun from the window of his room in the Great Temple on Yavin IV. He used to love sitting there, watching the dawn and listening to the chorus of songbirds greet the morning. He had especially loved sharing the ritual with Callista. Now that she was gone, the joy was gone too. Now all that the sunrise meant was that he had to get up and face another day without her. He had never experienced such deep sorrow in his life, and he frankly didn't know how to cope with it. It scared him a lot. Sometimes, he wondered if it wouldn't be easier just to end it all, to fling himself off the pinnacle of the Great Temple and finish his misery. Technically, his brain knew that he had to go on, that he had a responsibility to his students, his sister, and his niece and nephews. But sometimes the burden was just too much for his heart to bear.

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I think I've already lost you.

I think you're already gone.

I thought this place was an empire.

But now things have changed—I can't be sure

He sensed someone coming to knock on his door, heard the soft footsteps on the stone floor. Tionne, he was certain of it. He heard a timid knock, a gentle voice calling, "Master Skywalker?" Tionne was one of his best friends at the Academy, but recently he'd been pushing everyone away. He knew he was hurting Tionne, but he couldn't help it. Luke didn't even turn from his window, but simply called, "Come in."

Tionne opened the door tentatively and called his name again. "Master Skywalker?"

Luke turned his head to acknowledge her and nodded, but didn't rise to greet her. "What is it, Tionne?" From this distance he couldn't see her features, only her silhouette black against the golden sunlight pouring in behind her.

"I just wanted to remind you, there's a new student coming today at approximately 1600 hours," Tionne said shyly. "Will you be down to greet her?"

There was a long silence. Finally, Luke murmured, "Yes, yes, I will. Thank you, Tionne." Tionne left as silently as she had come. Luke sat there for a few more moments, then figured he'd get dressed and go greet his students, as was usually his custom in the mornings. He walked to his closet and pulled out his Jedi robes. He noticed a yellow box in the bottom of his closet. Funny, he didn't remember that being there before. He pulled it out and looked at it. _Oh. Oh. Now I remember._ The box was full of mementos of his and Callista's time together. He picked up a holo of her, dropped it. He held his aching head in his hands and wept. _Callista, why do you have to keep haunting me like this? Why did you have to take everything good with you?_

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I bet you're hard to get over

I bet the room just won't shine

I bet my hands I can stay here

I bet you need—more than you mind

He got dressed, looked in the mirror. Blast it, he looked like a fifty-year old. Callista'd even taken his good looks with her. He turned away quickly before it could trigger another fit of weeping and walked out the door and downstairs to the mess hall.

Everybody turned to face him as he walked into the mess hall. The emotions bombarded him from every side—fear, concern, sympathy, but most of all, relief. All the students were so glad to see him it hurt. Luke felt like the galaxy's biggest jerk. _They needed me so much, and I neglected them._ He brushed the guilt away briefly and smiled. _Boy, that hurts._ "Good morning, my students."

There was a minute of awkward silence, then one of the youngest students, a little human girl, stood up, her breakfast tray clattering to the floor. She ran to Luke and hugged his legs, dampening his pants with joyful tears. "Master Luke, I missed you!" she cried. "Please come and teach us today. We all missed you."

Luke knelt and hugged the girl. "I promise, I'll come to teach you today and every day after this."

Everyone in the mess hall was on their feet in an instant, clapping and cheering. The noise was deafening, and the wave of happy emotion enveloped Luke like a warm hug as he went from student to student, shaking hands and hugging the younger ones. He felt better than he had in weeks. _I was such an idiot to think that shutting myself up in my room would make things all right. This was what I needed._

But after he'd taught a few sessions, he headed back to his room to get something, and the memories came flooding back. He completely forgot what he had come up there for, just sat on a cushion and replayed his thoughts like a bad holovid. _Callista! Why, why did you leave? Baby, you didn't need to find your Force powers again. I had enough for the both of us._ He smiled involuntarily through his tears. _I wanted to be with you so much, wanted to start a family. It was so easy for you to leave. You weren't the one who had to cope with all this. We could have worked it out, I just know it. We just needed to try harder, that's all. Oh, Callista, I don't want to be without you._

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I think you're so mean—I think we should try

I think I could need—this in my life

I think I'm just scared—that I know too much

I know it's wrong, it's a problem I'm dealing

"Master Skywalker! Master Skywalker!" The youthful voices of his apprentices echoed through the stone corridors. Luke stood quickly, wiped the tears away with his sleeve. The children shouldn't see him like this. He walked to the door and opened it with a smile fixed on his face. "What's all the shouting for, my students?" A little Mon Calamari child ran up to him excitedly. "Don't you remember, Master Luke? The new student is here! The ship has landed! She's here!" it squeaked, then ran down the stairs at top speed. Luke followed him, mixing with the crowd of eager children, then abandoned his Jedi Master-like pace and started running too. "We'd better hurry," he cried, forgetting his sorrow for a moment. "We wouldn't want the new student to feel unwelcome!" The children laughed joyfully, and the sound of their merriment was like balm to Luke's soul.

When he arrived at the landing pad outside the temple, sure enough, a shiny freighter was there, and the students had already begun to help the crew unload supplies. Luke spotted his friend Wedge and waved to him. Wedge ran right over, calling, "Hey, Luke!" The two men shook hands cordially. "Great to see you again, Wedge," Luke said with genuine pleasure. He hadn't realized how much he missed the rest of the galaxy until now. "Same here, Luke," replied Wedge. "I volunteered for freighter duty on purpose to see you. I was sorry to hear about Callista. She was a great lady." Luke stiffened. The last thing he needed to hear was more sympathy. Wedge noticed Luke's unease and quickly changed the subject. "Anyway, I've brought the new student." He beckoned to a teenaged girl standing a few yards away. "Come here, Cella. I want you to meet Master Skywalker." He turned back to Luke. "I'm sure your sister told you how we found her." 

Luke smiled. "Yeah, a courier in the Senate, wasn't she?" 

Wedge nodded. "Yeah, and your sister realized she was a Force-adept. She was orphaned during the Lusankya incident when the Rebels took Coruscant, and was raised by the Sisters of Goodwill in their orphanage. I'm sure she'll make a great student, Luke."

The girl came forward shyly, sneaking glances at Luke. Her long brown hair was gathered into a single thick braid, and her hazel eyes were shining. She was quite tall for her age, and moved with the slight awkwardness of someone who wasn't quite accustomed to her size yet. She came to stand in between Luke and Wedge, still looking at her feet.

Wedge took the initiative. "Cella, this is Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master. Luke, this is Cella Poliani."

Luke extended his hand. "I'm very pleased to meet you, Cella."

Cella shook his hand and finally looked him in the eye with a smile. "I'm absolutely thrilled to meet you, Mr. Skywalker." She laughed nervously. "I never expected to be shaking the hand of a Jedi Master and war hero. Imagine, me, an orphan from Coruscant!"

Luke laughed heartily. "How old are you, Cella? And please, just call me Master Luke. Everyone else does."

"Fourteen, sir—I mean, Master Luke. I want to try my best to be a good Jedi. I won't disappoint you."

Luke smiled kindly at her. "Ambition is a good thing, Cella, but you don't need to worry about being perfect. You are welcomed here for yourself, not for your level of skill." He led the girl to Tionne at the door of the temple. "Tionne, please show Miss Cella to her quarters." He turned back to Cella. "Tionne will show you around and get you settled in here. I'll see you at the evening meal."

The other students warmed up to Cella instantly. The few teenaged apprentices were delighted to have someone of their own age with them, and she sat with them at the evening meal. Cella really seemed to be happy, and Luke was glad that she was fitting in well. But the excitement of her arrival was starting to fade, and the depression was beginning to settle on Luke again. He excused himself from the meal and went upstairs to his room. Once he was there, he started looking out the window again at the starlit night, wondering where, amidst all those stars and planets, Callista was. It occurred to him that he might never find out.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there—minutes, or hours. It hardly mattered. Then, he felt a gentle presence at the door, and heard a gentle hand open it. "Master Skywalker?" The voice was shy, as Tionne's had been that morning, but it wasn't her. Luke realized it was Cella. He tried to speak patiently. "What do you need, Cella?"

Cella came further into the room without being asked. Luke could see her clearly now, by the light of Yavin's other moons. Her hazel eyes shone brightly in the night. He felt slightly offended at her intrusion, but then he sensed the fear and nervousness pouring off her, and realized that she had come here with much difficulty. She spoke again, and Luke felt that she was trying to calm herself. "I, I don't need anything," she said uncertainly. "I felt…I mean, I…I thought maybe you…oh." She began backing out of the room, but Luke stopped her. 

"Don't be afraid," Luke said gently. "Tell me."

Cella sat on the straw matting that covered the floor and sighed. "I've always been strong in empathy. I felt how sad you were, and I had to come up here. I know this sounds stupid, but I thought you might need some help."

Luke smiled. "Thanks for your kind intentions, but I don't think anyone can help, really." He sighed. "Sometimes, I don't think I'll ever get better."

"I felt that you had lost somebody close to you," Cella said softly. "That's what brought me up here. I know exactly how that feels." She paused, then continued. "I lost both my parents when I was five. The scariest thing about the Lusankya was that it came right out of the blue. I couldn't believe it. I thought my parents had died and my home had been destroyed because I had been bad or something. I felt so guilty, even though I didn't really need to." A tear ran down her cheek, and Luke picked up her hand and held it comfortingly.

Cella continued, "Eventually, though, I realized it wasn't my fault. The Sisters helped me understand that. They explained to me exactly what had happened. They told me that they loved me as if I was their own child, and they would always be there for me. I owe them everything. When I felt your grief, I thought maybe you needed someone like that too." Cella blushed. "It was really stupid. I shouldn't have intruded on you like this." And she began to go.

Luke grasped her hand, called her back with a smile. "Don't leave yet, Cella." He spoke slowly, turning over the thoughts in his mind. "No one has tried to do something like this for me. I think—they've all been too scared, too in awe of me. Thank you, Cella. Thanks for remembering that I've got feelings too." Cella smiled, and he hugged her warmly. "Now go, it's getting late." Cella nodded and left as quietly as she had come.

Luke stretched and sighed. He felt as if a great weight had been lifted off him. Finally, he felt like he had purpose in his life again. Cella's simple, innocent words had worked wonders on him. He knew he wasn't completely healed yet, but these things took time. He knew he would always carry a bit of Callista with him, and he hoped she would do the same with him. Now he was ready to come home.

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If you're gone—Maybe it's time to come home

There's an awful lot of breathing room, but I can hardly move

If you're gone—Maybe I need to come home

There's a little bit of something me in everything in you


End file.
